And I'm one of them.
I just read the most recent article from the Internet Monk. He's generally a good writer and was able to put some things clearly that I've had mulling around in my mind for a while.
I suppose those thoughts can be summed up in my title. The biggest liars I know are Christians. There's so much wrapped up in that statement that it's hard to know where to begin.
My mind goes back to the tumultuous years of high school and my church's youth group. I was pegged early in my youth group years as a "leader". Being a leader meant that I set the example for the younger kids to look up to (or so I was told). I wanted to please my youth pastor, so I set out to be a good leader.
I went to church almost every week. I went on mission trips. I sat on youth committees. I "witnessed" to my friends. I did Bible studies. And I never, ever admitted that I was angry, afraid, and confused about what I actually believed. I didn't tell them that I was lying, drinking, and looking at pornography every chance I got. Leaders didn't do those things. Leaders were good Christians.
I believe that my youth group experience is indicative of the way many Christians live their lives. We experience pressure, for whatever reason, to be good Christians. Sometimes it's outward pressure (from friends, pastors, etc.), but I believe that most often it is inward pressure, a pressure we put on ourselves.
This need to be seen as good Christians has made us miserable. We've isolated ourselves from those around us; maybe not physically but certainly emotionally and spiritually. We're drowning in a dark sea of our own lies, secrets, addictions, doubts, and bitterness. We're tired, alone and afraid. We want someone to help us, but we can't show them that side of us. We can't show them our addiction to pornography, our deeply rooted bitterness, our fears of death and life. So we paint our tombs with whitewash. We put some pretty flowers around them so that no one will pay attention to the stinking death that is inside.
Why are we holding on for dear life to the lies we tell ourselves and others? I think the answer is complicated, but I would suggest one item to be among the root causes. We don't really believe. (NOTE: My use of the word "believe" in the following paragraphs probably requires some explanation. I'm viewing belief as an idea that affects our thoughts, motivations, and actions. In other words, belief isn't belief if it doesn't affect who you are and what you do.)
We don't really believe that we are "that bad of sinners". Look at the language we use to describe sin: struggles, phases, backslide, moment of weakness. Those are things we do. We don't "sin". Sin is what those drunken prostitutes on the side of the road do. We might slip every now and then but we don't sin.
We can't read Scripture and keep this view. Christ, in the sermon on the mount pegs us all for lying, murdering adulterers. David wrote songs about his wretchedness. Paul talks about being the worst of sinners.
We don't believe we're going to die and have to face God. We go day by day purposefully distracted from the death and judgment that are to come. We act like we're promised tomorrow. We think of death as something that is far off. Does this make sense? How far off does death have to be for you to be comfortable with it?
We don't believe that Christ is really our only source of life and hope. If we did we would be more willing to not only admit the depth of our sin to ourselves but to those around us. There's some part of us that just won't let go of the idea that "if I'm good enough then I'll be ok."
We don't really believe that what people think about the creator of the universe is more important than what they think about us. This seems like a ridiculous statement, but read the below verses from 2nd Corinthians:
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
When I am weak, sinful, stupid, forgetful, selfish and downright willfully disobedient it is all the more reason for me to sing the praises of Christ because he saved me, but instead I choose to protect my reputation and try and forget what I've done.
So I ask myself what do I believe? Do I really believe I'm wretched? Do I really believe that I'm going to die? Do I really believe that Christ is the only one keeping me from the wrath of a holy God? Do I really believe that same holy God should receive praise, even at the expense of my reputation?
I don't know, but I know that they're questions that deserve some thought.
Posted by amduffy at October 1, 2004 01:41 PM | TrackBackDoubting Thomas always gets a bad rap, and yet Jesus was so gentle with him. We are self righteous. I struggle when I hear people talking about sins being equal. All bad enough to keep us froms Gods presence. That is when I realized that I hated the fact that someones murder could be considered not as bad; like someone elses lie. After contemplation I had to admit that the truth is that my lie is just as bad as someone elses murder. make sense? Yes, we are all liars. Thankfully the example is Christ and not me.
Posted by: Sember at October 1, 2004 03:08 PMEveryone has their secrets. It can be something they have done that their first degree of seperation knows about or not. It could only be a thought. The burden of free will and a creative mind is that the mind will produce thoughts and possibly desires that are outside the norms of "acceptable". Even the "best" among us have them. It is natural.
There are those those that suggest that it is our ability to "overcome" those less desirable thoughts that make us civilized. If that is true, then the next logical step in the evolution of civilization is the acceptance of those thoughts as normal without self condimnation and social stigma.
Jimmy Carter has "lusted in his heart" after other women (playboy interview 1976). Jimmy Swaggart found with a prostitute. Bill Clinton in the White House with Monica. Ben Franklin, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington - all had many affairs. History is filled with great men and women that have made significant contributions to humanity, but had their "flawed human" side. Fortuntately, we judge them for what they did on their best day, not their worst. We admire their best thoughts and do not judge their worst.
If there is a problem with society, it is that we have become voyeurs that look upon those that lead us to find their flaw at the worst moment and use it to lessen what they do at their best moment. We have become a society that loves to tear down a hero.
Judge not, least ye be judged. We are all weak and all live in despereate fear we will be found out.
Sequoyah
Posted by: Sequoyah at October 1, 2004 03:13 PM