clearly defined lines of doubt and uncertainty

rational thinking for fun and profit

A friend of mine is getting an MBA. He said that the major thrust of his program was to teach you how to think rationally. He showed me the book that is the focal point of the program. I read a few chapters and was really impressed with some of the points they made. I can't remember all of them, but here are a few that stood out:

1. A discussion is an exchange of ideas. It is not an attack on the person who originated an idea.

Most of us become very easily attached to an idea if it originated with us, so we end up defending our idea even if it is shown to be erroneous because we feel as if our worth is somehow tied up in the validity of the idea being presented. For example, a discussion between a husband and wife in the midst of a long car trip could go something like this:

W: I think we’re lost.
H: We’re not lost. I know exactly where we are.
W: I haven’t seen any civilization for about 10 miles. Aren’t we supposed to be on the highway?
H: This is a short cut.
W: I don’t see anything that looks like a short cut on the map. Besides, you’ve never been here before.
H: The map doesn’t have every road on it. I know what I’m doing.

Whether you can identify with the subject of the above example or not I believe that most of us can probably identify with the nature of the discussion. We hold to all kinds of ideas just because it is our idea.

2. The main purpose of a discussion is to “move the discussion forward”, that is, to come to some sort of resolution about the topic being discussed (if possible).

Unfortunately most people treat a discussion like a battle where the person you’re talking to is the enemy. They are not the enemy. You should be working towards the same goal, not fighting to show that your idea is better and therefore “win” the discussion. If we start viewing those with opposing viewpoints on resolvable issues as allies (even if they don’t view us as such) our discussions can be become much more productive.

3. We need to learn to examine our own ideas as critically as we examine others.
We should ask ourselves questions like: “Why do I think this? Is this thought valid and fair? What would I think about this idea if it were coming from someone else instead of me? What are the logical consequences of holding this idea or value?” Personally, I believe this would help solve a lot of problems in all types of human relationship (marriage, friendship, coworker, family, etc.). The source of much conflict in relationship seems to be some sort of power struggle where we think we have to protect ourselves from being hurt, threatened, or marginalized. I think that if we moved from that defensive mindset to a mindset of rational thinking that we would see that many of our ideas that contribute to conflict don’t hold water, and that we often hold those around us to standards that we ourselves don’t meet.

I don’t know anyone (myself included) who can think this way all the time. No matter how rational we strive to be we’re still humans that have feelings, passions, and drives that are going to keep us from always being fair and balanced in our thinking, but I believe that many of us could benefit from striving to think more rationally.

Posted by amduffy at December 30, 2004 10:47 AM | TrackBack